0. Prologue

“Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.”

— Morticia Addams, The Addams Family

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“Chaos, by its very definition, cannot be controlled. Once introduced, all order and intention is rendered useless. The outcome of chaos can never be predicted. The only certainty it brings… is the devastation it leaves in its wake.”

— Emily Thorne, Revenge

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“A rule is a rule. And let’s face it: without rules, there’s chaos.”

— Cosmo Kramer, Seinfeld

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“Chaos isn’t a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail, and never get to try again. The fall breaks them. And some are given a chance to climb, but refuse. They cling to the realm, or love, or the gods…illusions. Only the ladder is real. The climb is all there is.”

— Petyr Baelish, Game of Thrones

***

Xaos

***

“Life is like a game of chess….”

“To win you have to make a move…”

“Play it wisely…”

“Alright,” Grim started, forcefully disrupting the quietude around them. If his opponent were startled, they didn’t show it. “I must ask. What in the bloody hell is up with this new form of yours?!”

Life shot him a look.

“Well, we’re in human territory, aren’t we? Figured I might as well dress for the occasion.”

“You look ridiculous.”

“I don’t care.”

“Alright. It doesn’t matter. See, the reason I called you here…”

“…Got no idea what you were doing on Earth in the first place, but go on.”

“…Is because I have a proposition for you.”

Life raised an eyebrow. “A proposition?”

“Yeah…” Grim shrugged as he reconsidered his words. “More of a… favor, if you will. You see, the thing is…”

And so Grim told Life everything – from the moment he first met this peculiar human named Remi Greene, to what he had already foreseen would be the last (he wisely omitted the part where he chose to forego the laws of nature to bring him back). He told them all about his fascination in this particular being; a being who, regretfully, had despite Grim’s slight interferences (it was all a matter of placing the right being in the right place at the right time) decided to be mortal.

“So?” Life asked, their patience running thin. It was a quality they weren’t exactly known for.

“So I realize he must live out his life the way he has…” Grim swallowed hard. “…chosen to. That doesn’t, however, mean that there cannot be a new, immortal version out there…”

“Oh, no,” Life interrupted him. “No, no, no. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this, Grim. I don’t take requests anymore.”

They shuddered. “Not after the last time “

“Oh, come on!” Grim exclaimed.

He spent a moment to compose himself.

“You owe me,” he decided to state. His lips would have formed into a smirk, had he had them.

Life’s eyebrows raised another few inches. “I owe you? How?”

“How many times have you come to me with yet another fresh new creation you just could not wait to release… so much so that you had to compel me to prematurely rid you of one of your current ones?”

Life snorted. “Look, I’m a perfectionist. I’m finicky. You cannot…”

“…Let us play on it,” Grim cut in.

“What?”

“Let us play a game of chess. If I win, I get my prize.”

“And what if I win?”

“I shall continue to comply with your finicky requests.”

“Fine, then. Let’s do it.”

“…Or you are dead.”

“Checkmar.”

“Oh, come on!!”

Life couldn’t quite control their anger.

“That is not fair!”

Grim shrugged.

“We played on it. Were you not the one who once told me that chess is a sacred game… not unlike Life?”

Life huffed angrily. “Fine. You’ll get your request.”

***

A few months later…

Life shuffled closer to their companion and nemesis awkwardly, their reluctance all but overt.

Grim diverged his attention from the game of chess before him to look at them.

“And?”

“Yeah, so… I mean, I did everything you asked for.  Worked exactly according to your descriptions…”

“Underappreciated genius with some hotheaded tendencies, secretly a fool for love, just mildly – or maybe a little more than mildly – unstable… Looks like a Hollywood alien and a human skeleton had a love child… So, really, what I’m saying here is you can’t blame me for the final product. I mean, it’s been your product all along the way, so…”

Grim shot them a wary look. “Show me your creation.”

***

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She keeps a Moët et Chandon in her pretty cabinet –

Let them eat cake she says, just like Marie Antoinette –

A built-in remedy for Khrushchev and Kennedy
At anytime an invitation, you can’t decline –

Caviar and cigarettes, well versed in etiquette
Extraordinarily nice

She’s a Killer Queen
Gunpowder, gelatine –

Dynamite with a laser beam
Guaranteed to blow your mind –

To avoid complications, she never kept the same address –

In conversation, she spoke just like a baroness

Met a man from China, went down to Geisha Minah
Then again incidentally, if you’re that way inclined
Perfume came naturally from Paris
For cars, she couldn’t care less
Fastidious and precise –

Drop of a hat she’s as willing as, playful as a pussy cat –

Then momentarily out of action –

Temporarily out of gas –

To absolutely drive
Drive you wild, wild
She’s all out to get you –

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“I am not the least bit interested in this being.”

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Recommended at the price
Insatiable in appetite –

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“Frankly, this creature deeply disturbs me.”

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Wanna try?

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A/N: Yeah… this one is really mostly for readers of Pariah: this new main character may remind you of Remi a bit, so here is my explanation. Totally serious!